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801. bein_hasdorim
     Member

     I just reminded myself of a funny story that happened to a
     friend of mine, so he was on this date and they were discussing
     many topics (like in the CR)and one was the shidduch crises,
     they were talking bout how there's many girla perfectly normal
     who mamish dont get offers for months at a time, & how there's
     many more girls then boys etc.. so the after some more of this
     he sighed saying, nu, what're you gonna do? (rhetorically)
     and she answered.. "Nothing!" (in a monotonous voice.)
     (I still remember the way he said it)
     He thought she didn't chap but later on in a different
     conversation he also made the same remark
     nu, what're you gonna do? & she replied again.. "Nothing!"

     He thought it was hilarious & told me later.
     Till today we joke around & whenever one of us says
     well..what're you gonna do?
     The other replies a monotonous "Nothing!"

     Posted 6 years ago #

802. mickey
     Member

     jew fem 02

     So mickey, what made you guess that this happened in Jerusalem? Are you my secret stalker?

     no it happened to me to that we waited 25 mins till someone sat us down... was it on kanfei nesharim?? o sorry it so long to reply

     Posted 6 years ago #

803. Dr. Pepper
     Ph.D.

     That was a great story ames. Thanks for sharing it.

     The Doc and I were laughing so hard when we read it together last night.

     He actually felt bad that someone outdid his proposal but I'm actually relieved that he didn't think of that. :)

     Posted 6 years ago #

804. jewishfeminist02
     jewishfeminist01 + jewishfeminist02

     No, it wasn't on Kanfei Nesharim, it was at Center One. I guess I should consider myself fortunate since we only waited 10 minutes, not 25. Incidentally, I heard a few weeks ago that he is seriously dating another girl now and sounds like they are pretty compatible.

     Anyway, mickey, you should stop by the CR more often!

     Posted 6 years ago #

805. Onion Breath
     Member

     I heard a really funny shidduch story that happened to my friend's sister. She was in seminary and she needed a place to stay for shabbos. So she called her cousin who she frequented often on Thursday night and asked if she should come. Her cousin told her "I'd love to have you, there's just one small problem. My husband invited over five guys from yeshiva and they're all really frum and would feel extremely uncomfortable if there's a single seminary girl there." My friend's sister told her she really had nowhere else to go so her cousin told her to come for shabbos anyway and maybe they could figure out some arrangements for her for that meal.
     Anyway, come Friday night and my friend's sister had not found another place to go for the meal. So she and her cousin came up with a great idea. They realized the boys would not be uncomfortable if she was a married woman. So her cousin gave her a tichel and an old housecoat and told her to put it on and keep a straight face the entire meal. She sat next to her cousin and pretended to be nebach an almanah or divorcee. Okay, they manage to keep straight faces the whole meal and none of the guys notice anything strange. One of them even makes sure to be extra polite and kept making sure the food was passed to her and stuff. They are literally holding back from plotzing the entire time and her cousin kept covering up her tittering with lame excuses about finding her husband's devar torah funny or whatever. Anyway none of the boys notice anything strange. after they leave, my friend's sister, her cousin and husband plopped on the couch and laughed for about 45 minutes. after they calmed down the cousin realized that she needed a pillow for her guest and didn't have any because the previous week she had given some out for someone making a simcha and didn't get them back. So she sent my friend's sister to a neighbour to borrow a pillow.
     To make a long story short, the neighbor met my friend's sister and was talking to her for a few minutes. She decided that she had a shidduch for my friend's sister. she told her that she was a bit young and wasn't dating yet she wanted to wait till she was done seminary. anyway, a couple of months later they went out... and you guessed it, in walks the guys who was being really polite to her at the table. He almost fainted then and there and so did she. But as soon as she told him the story he thought it was hilarious.....
     They're married with a kid!

     Posted 6 years ago #

806. Dr. Pepper
     Ph.D.

     Thanks for the great story, I couldn't stop laughing while I was reading it.

     Glad to hear there was a happy ending.

     Posted 6 years ago #

807. Mayan_Dvash
     Member

     Onion Breath, that's precious!!! It speaks to the essence of Shidduchin: Sheker Dover, Kesef Notel.
     ;

     Posted 6 years ago #

808. mepal
     Member

     Wow! That was really funny, onion!

     Posted 6 years ago #

809. areivimzehlazeh
     Member

     hey- that's crazy :) but funny
     Why couldn't they eat in the kitchen? They had to put up a purim shpiel?
     Why'd she dress as a nebach, why not just a normal married woman?
     There are no more questions at this time your honor

     Posted 6 years ago #

810. mepal
     Member

     Yeshivish, I'm shocked.

     Posted 6 years ago #

811. I can only try
     "We all try. You succeed." George HaChasid - Slayer of Trolls.

     Onion Breath-

     Great story.
     Personally, once someone goes from sheitel to snood or vice-versa I don't even recognize them.

     Posted 6 years ago #

812. jewishfeminist02
     jewishfeminist01 + jewishfeminist02

     "why not just a normal married woman"

     because then wouldn't they ask her where her husband was?

     Great story.

     Posted 6 years ago #

813. Dr. Pepper
     Ph.D.

     This isn't really a dating story since it happened while we were married but this wonderful topic has become a mais mitzvah so I'm going to post it anyway.

     When I was interviewing for the job I have now I was told that I wouldn't be allowed to take off for Chol Hamoed. When Pesach came around my supervisor told me that if I have enough off days left he'll let me take off for the whole Chol Hamoed provided that I log in every morning and answer all e-mails from the previous day. I thought it was very generous but my wife didn't think it was fair to have to do work on an off day.

     For part of Yom Tov we were staying by my parents. One morning my wife came down stairs, sat down on the couch and started talking with my mother and grandmother. After a few minutes she started wondering when I was going to be home from Shachris. My grandmother told her that I already came home and was working in the basement. Looking right at my mother she said, "I really don't know why he's doing this if he's not getting paid for it". My mother was very taken aback and my grandmother was rolling her eyes while muttering something in Yiddish which my wife didn't understand.

     So my wife came down to the basement to find me but I wasn't in front of the computer. Then she heard some banging in the laundry room and found me lying under the sink with a whole bunch of tools. "What are you doing?" she asked. "Oh, the faucet was leaking so my mother asked me replace the faulty valve..."

     Posted 5 years ago #

814. Joseph
     the first

     ROTFLMKO

     Posted 5 years ago #

815. YW Moderator-42
     Life, The Coffee Room, and Subtitles.

     Doc, thanks for reviving this thread.

     Joseph, any good stories to share?

     Posted 5 years ago #

816. havesomeseichel
     Member

     Dr. Pepper- you literally healed this thread.... Your stories are hilarious and please, keep them coming! no one can tell them like you can!

     Posted 5 years ago #

817. areivimzehlazeh
     Member

     Doc- this place is gonna need your Phd if you persist with these stories ;)

     Posted 5 years ago #

818. mepal
     Member

     Doc, I'm assuming someone had much explaining to do there...

     Posted 5 years ago #

819. YW Moderator-80
     Member

     That's "splanin" Lucy

     Posted 5 years ago #

820. areivimzehlazeh
     Member

     80, how's your momma back in Cuba doin

     Posted 5 years ago #

821. YW Moderator-80
     Member

     She's fine. Still taking her Vitameatavegamin.

     Posted 5 years ago #

822. Joseph
     the first

     One sec doc. You refer to your mother as "my mother", instead of mommy, when talking to your wife? That is something you definitely should be discussing in How To Address Your Mother In Law.

     Posted 5 years ago #

823. I can only try
     "We all try. You succeed." George HaChasid - Slayer of Trolls.

     Dr. Pepper-

     Great story!
     You should sent it into Readers Digest (get the payment in cash, since they're in bankruptcy).

     One small problem - you may be in a bit of trouble:
     "Didn't we have an agreement that we're not going to discuss things here?
     click: PepperPost
     Might I suggest 1-800-flowers?
     Alternately, 1-800-grovels usually works)

     Posted 5 years ago #

824. areivimzehlazeh
     Member

     oiy, the CR memory board
     We're in too deep ;)

     Posted 5 years ago #

825. mepal
     Member

     ICOT, you know you may be kicking up some shalom bayis trouble here...;)

     Posted 5 years ago #

826. bajew613
     Member

     I was once go out in Israel and we had to do it in the morning because thats what worked out... So on the way there in the cab the driver was driving us crazy that we should get engaged and going on and on.. (it was our FIRST date). well then on the way back we had to walk to the tachana mirkazit and of course had to walk right through Geula and it was only 1:00pm. so everyone was out and everyone was starring at us. how embarrasing. The funniest part about this story is that were not married to each other. ;) ;) :)

     Posted 5 years ago #

827. squeak
     Makes smalltalk with the two most sandy ectoplasmic beings on Earth (not to mention the Man on the Moon).

     Dr. Pepper, it is amazing how you are a never ending source of side-splitting stories! I'm still waiting for you to contact me about that book offer we spoke about.

     Posted 5 years ago #

828. areivimzehlazeh
     Member

     Excuse me while I take my 75% share.... stealing lines, stealing business ideas- what's next- stolen identity? ;)

     Posted 5 years ago #

829. I can only try
     "We all try. You succeed." George HaChasid - Slayer of Trolls.

     mepal-

     Punkt farkert!
     I'm suggesting the refuah before the makah.

     Posted 5 years ago #

830. squeak
     Makes smalltalk with the two most sandy ectoplasmic beings on Earth (not to mention the Man on the Moon).

     well, areivim, I didn't expect you'd remember. After all, it was more than one page ago....

     Posted 5 years ago #

831. areivimzehlazeh
     Member

     Is that the new & improved squeaky speaking?

     Posted 5 years ago #

832. anon for this
     Member

     areivimzehlazeh, I don't think he'd appreciate the nickname "squeaky".

     Posted 5 years ago #

833. mepal
     Member

     sounds like the same squeak I've heard in the past. Anyone's got some WD40 to spare?

     Posted 5 years ago #

834. squeak
     Makes smalltalk with the two most sandy ectoplasmic beings on Earth (not to mention the Man on the Moon).

     anon, thank you. Unfortunately this is similar to "asher karcha baderech". Once the ice has been broken, everyone jumps in :) I mean this in good fun.

     Posted 5 years ago #

835. Dr. Pepper
     Ph.D.

     I can only try-
     I don't think I'm in any trouble- it's something we both agreed on; I don't either know why I was doing it if I wasn't getting paid!

     squeak- I'm still waiting for your review and blurb, then we can talk.

     Posted 5 years ago #

836. areivimzehlazeh
     Member

     are you comparing me to... nice pay back, squeaky

     Posted 5 years ago #

837. squeak
     Makes smalltalk with the two most sandy ectoplasmic beings on Earth (not to mention the Man on the Moon).

     areivim,

     Not you. Mepal.

     You are the one who came next....

     P.S. that is why I wrote that I meant it in good fun

     Posted 5 years ago #

838. mepal
     Member

     so squeak, I take it you enjoy this ;)

     Posted 5 years ago #

839. anon for this
     Member

     You're welcome squeak. Actually I don't think areivim realized why that nickname might offend.

     Posted 5 years ago #

840. squeak
     Makes smalltalk with the two most sandy ectoplasmic beings on Earth (not to mention the Man on the Moon).

     You're probably right, but either way - I sincerely doubt that he (or mepal) were being anything but friendly.

     Posted 5 years ago #

841. mepal
     Member

     squeak, that's the attitude we need around here. Would you like to teach that to some newbies around?

     Posted 5 years ago #

842. squeak
     Makes smalltalk with the two most sandy ectoplasmic beings on Earth (not to mention the Man on the Moon).

     They'll learn ;)

     We'll make them learn!

     Posted 5 years ago #

843. areivimzehlazeh
     Member

     k, splain please why squeaky is more offensive than I thought
     oh, btw squeaky- what makes "You are the one who came next...." any better…?
     (Yes, of course this is all “;)”. But I don't feel the need to put that after every line when speaking with certain individuals...)

     Posted 5 years ago #

844. mepal
     Member

     yeah, and the rest of us gotta suffer till then...

     Posted 5 years ago #

845. squeak
     Makes smalltalk with the two most sandy ectoplasmic beings on Earth (not to mention the Man on the Moon).

     areivim, I am one of those individuals. Don't worry.

     Posted 5 years ago #

846. squeak
     Makes smalltalk with the two most sandy ectoplasmic beings on Earth (not to mention the Man on the Moon).

     areivim - sorry, didn't see your question before. I think that anon was referring to someone whose infamy died out before you were born, but who was recently released from prison. I know that you weren't referring to her.

     Posted 5 years ago #

847. areivimzehlazeh
     Member

     wasn't I? ;);)

     Posted 5 years ago #

848. neatfreak
     Member

     hi i have been reading this thread and i am cracking up the whole time. I dont have a lot of dating stories as i only dated 2 guys one being my husband. But on our first date (his first date ever) we had a sort of funny story. I live out of town and he came in and we were told to go to a certain hotel- butit wasnt such a great choice. we went in and looked for a lobby to sit in but there was only the front entrance with a few chairs so then we saw a resturant that had a drink bar attached so we went in and asked if we could buy a drink and take it to elsewhere in the hotel cuz we didnt really want to sit in the resturant part. so the waiter said to my husband.. well if you have a room you can. are you staying here tonight? and being very nervous he answered yes and then turned beet red and went no no no we are just staying for a few hours we dont have a room. i had to work hard not to crack a smile.

     Posted 5 years ago #

849. mepal
     Member

     omg, I would've burst out laughing! You're good, NF!

     Posted 5 years ago #

850. areivimzehlazeh
     Member

     LOL! LOL! LOL!
     btw- what's wrong with cracking up? It was funny! like hahaha... capiche? (ok, bad spelling)

     Posted 5 years ago #

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