Lately hair extensions have become quite popular. Girls who had thin and limp hair are now adding extensions to get a full head of hair. What does everyone think? Is it a form of deception or is it merely doing one's hishtadlus in dating? How far should we go?
YWN Coffee Room » Shidduchim
Girls wearing hair extensions on dates
(39 posts)-
Posted 10 months ago #
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Why don't they just wear a wig?
Posted 10 months ago # -
There's nothing wrong with it. It's no different than makeup. You should probably tell the guy about them at some point.
Posted 10 months ago # -
If its no different than makeup, why must you tell the guy about it? You don't have to tell him about your makeup.
Posted 10 months ago # -
Ohr Chodesh: Because makeup is obvious to the guy that she's wearing. This might not be.
Posted 10 months ago # -
Why shouldn't a woman look attractive for her date? No point in telling. As long as she looks good and the guy likes her, nothing more to say. Should she say where she bought all her makeup and how she applies it?
Posted 10 months ago # -
95% of girls wear them at their weddings. It's not like she has c'v no leg and is wearing a prosthetic. They are very common.
Posted 10 months ago # -
What on earth is this thing, anyways?
Posted 10 months ago # -
i dont think theres a point in telling! first of all its to mke her look more attractive and secondly after her wedding she will hopefully be covering her hair most of the time :)
Posted 10 months ago # -
not only how is it different from makeup.....but how is it different from when a girl irons or curls her hair o.O oy vey!!!! how is he ever supposed to know what shes like!!!!! *gasp*
Posted 10 months ago # -
Does she have to tell if she gets plastic surgery to help her dating prospects?
Posted 10 months ago # -
Do boys think this is weird? Would they rather know or not if a girl is wearing extensions?
Also can you tell if people are wearing extensions? I've seen many brides that wear them and they are not blended in!
Posted 10 months ago # -
Many brides wear fake eye lashes at their weddings, what's the diff?
Posted 10 months ago # -
Well i actually noticed one of my (single) friends wearing a wig recently. I didnt say anything because i wasnt 100% sure because it was a really good wig, so i asked another friend and she said she noticed the same thing. I'm not really sure why she's started wearing a wig because i know she hasnt lost her hair or anything but i just found it really strange.....
Posted 10 months ago # -
I would actually ask a rabbi on this first. The reason is because your date will eventually find out what you look like without makeup. But say you have really thin hair and after marriage the guy finds out that you actually look pretty different. Perhaps not as attractive as you lead him to believe. So really that could invalidate the marriage.
Better ask yourself if you really think its worth fooling the guy over something like this. Many guys won't care they just want to see YOU as you are - and with good reason. Attraction is important, if you lose that the day after marriage because you had all this fake stuff on you then i can see some troubling times ahead.
Posted 10 months ago # -
MorahRach: that is a very small difference. hair extensions can really make quite a big difference. One of my friends has very short hair and her extensions add on a good 9 inches to her hair. To some boys that want a girl with nice long hair...it could be considered dishonest? Couldnt it?
Posted 10 months ago # -
Why is it dishonest? Couldn't the girl simply let her hair grow longer if her husband wanted longer hair?
Posted 10 months ago # -
There are girls who think it's pretty to make their hair look like wigs!! It's not and it's really unattractive!!!
Posted 10 months ago # -
More_2: What do you mean? Isn't a large part of a girl's beauty her hair? There is a reason why people spend so much money on their wigs!
Posted 10 months ago # -
So, if a girl wears garments to make her look thinner (spanx, etc), does she then have to tell him she's actually 1" wider? Oh, please!
Posted 10 months ago # -
Hair extensions aren't tznius.
Posted 10 months ago # -
How would you feel if a guy wore a toupee to mask his baldness?
Posted 10 months ago # -
Baldness vs longer hair are two very different things. Hair can grow longer.
Posted 10 months ago # -
Boys please answer this: Would you want to know or would you rather remain blissfully oblivious. I have two friends that got engaged and married. One decided never to tell her husband, letting him assume she got a drastic hair cut for her shaitel to fit. One decided to let him in on the secret. What do boys want?
Posted 10 months ago # -
I think a girl with hair extensions would be a perfect shidduch for a bald bochor with a toupee.
Posted 10 months ago # -
L'aniyas datti, the topic altogether belongs in the Ezras Noshim, not the Yeshiva cofee room. Shame, shame!
Posted 10 months ago # -
Shtender Bender: No I believe it should go here because its just of the many things that girls are doing for their dates. And I want to know what the boys that go out with these type of girls would think.
Posted 10 months ago # -
...must agree with choppy
;Posted 10 months ago # -
How about she focuses on the important issues?
Like earning enough money so he can sit and drink coffee all day in front of a sefer while looking down on people who work for a living.
Posted 10 months ago # -
Im a guy and I'll say again, its completely dishonest. And frankly, when i was dating i would tell the girl pls don't bother spending the time to put on make up, i want to see you how you are. I think make up belongs on only one type of person, a clown. (And my wife is very happy with my logic because she doesn't have to spend a ridiculous amount of time and money on the stupid stuff.)
Posted 10 months ago # -
If its important the the guy should feel comfortable to ask if they are going toward an engagement.. If either the girl feels uncomfortable sharing this info or if the guy feels uncomfortable asking this info... Skip it.. And go on with life.
Posted 10 months ago # -
Shtender Bender, the Ezras Nashim isn't much better. All the men daven and learn there.
Posted 10 months ago # -
A friend of mine was in Reb Yisochor Meir's office, he heard him say, yes, yes, yes, and then he banged the phone down.
He asked him what happened, he said, someone called him up about a bochur for a shidduch, they asked him is he a masmid, can he learn, does he have good middos, then they asked him if the bochur was handsome
Posted 10 months ago # -
Looks are inevitably a part of every shidduch, to not care at all is quite rare. As such, I think every girl should do what it takes to put her best foot forward, obviously barring extreme unhealthy measures.
Posted 10 months ago # -
!! So this rav thinks that you shouldnt care about looks?
Posted 10 months ago # -
It sounds like it, and while that is very lofty its a bit unreasonable.
How do girls style their extensions?
Posted 10 months ago # -
you can't compare hair extensions to to a toupee for a totally bald guy.the purpose of hair extensions is to either 1)make hair fuller, and 2) make hair longer. its not to cover up what the girls really look like. i mean, i guess for some it could be, but can't say its why most girls do it. a toupee for a bald guy bdavka is to make himself look like he is not bald.
also, if a girl is gonna get married and put on a shaitel that's just as long and curled/blown as the hair extensions she's wearing, who cares? she's not deceiving you. first of all she probably wears the extensions not only on dates, but on shabbos, and to friends weddings... and some even every day.and also that's obviously what she wants to look like all the time, so where's the deceit?
and, pplz, even in the Torah the women would make themselves look beautiful. who are we to say that its deceitful and only for clowns? if the ppl in the time of the torah were wearing makeup to look beautiful, then its good enough for me!
Posted 10 months ago # -
Okay, I'm sure you'll agree that a toupee for a partially bald guy is the same as a girl wearing hair extensions. They would make a perfect shidduch for each other. 1) it makes his hair fuller, and 2) it make his hair longer. It's not to cover up what the guy really looks like.
Also, if a guy is gonna get married and wear a toupee that's the same toupee he's wearing on his dates, who cares? He's not deceiving you. First of all he wears the toupee not only on dates, but on Shabbos, and to friends weddings... and every day. And also that's obviously what he wants to look like all the time, so where's the deceit?
Posted 10 months ago # -
i don't want a guy with long hair, thank you... a nice yeshivish cut is just great.
Posted 10 months ago #
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