I am still following this thread, suffering with each of your posts. Please don't be upset with me, but I will once again broach the topic of bipolar disorder and the great possibility that your son is suffering from it (or at least some form of a mood disorder requiring medication).
You brought up in the past that since your son never had a manic episode, he does not qualify for a diagnosis of bipolar disorder (based on the DSM IV). There is something critical you need to undersand. Only in the past several years has bipolar disorder been discovered to exist in children and teenagers. Prior to that, it was thought to exist only in adults. The DSM IV, which has yet to be updated, is providing the ADULT PRESENTATION of the disorder which often looks a lot different than the teenage version, hence many teenagers "dont qualify" for the diagnosis. Your son does not need to have a manic episode to qualify for this diagnosis. His chronic irritability, destructive rages, and the various other behaviours are all part of the pediatric bipolar picture.
I know its hard to imagine, but the solution, at least to a very large extent, may be sitting on the shelf of your local pharmacy. The situation has gotten so grave that he is now wishing death upon himself and his parents. What can be more convincing that this poor child is imprisoned within his illness?
You once told me "if there was a pill that could fix my son I would stuff his closet with it". How do you know that pill does not exist? Have you tried any? Please keep in mind that I am referring to mood stabilizing meds, not anti-depressants or stimulants which can make matters worse.
After reading your posts, I am thoroughly convinced that there is great merit to my position. Not that I am 100% convinced that he's bipolar, just that there is a good chance that he is.
I am not getting paid a salary or commission for these posts. Obviously I am coming on strong (as MODERATOR 18 noted). Ask youself; what on earth does this person want from me? Why won't he take NO for an answer? Why does he persist? Why won't he drop it? There are two possible answers to those questions. Either I'm the controlling, obsessive type, or I know something you don't. What if I know something you don't WOW? The very fact that I have come on strong, persisted with zeal, and spent time writing despite your rejecting my position time and again should alert you to the possibility that I'm privvy to information that I have and you need.
It pains me that the solution to your problem may be closer than you think, but still gets disregarded. Maybe, just maybe, what I am saying has truth to it?
I'm sure you've heard the famous mythical mashal of the man who was drowning who cried out to Hashem "please save me!"...a few moments later someone on the shore threw him a life jacket. The drowning man refused claiming "no, no Hashem will save me!"...then a boat came to rescue him, but the man again refused citing the same line of reasoning. Finally a helicopter came, but the man persisted that Hashem will save him. Eventually he drowned. He came before Hashem and humbley asked "Dear Hashem, I had such faith in your ability to save me, why did you let me down?" Hashem replied "Let you down?? I sent you a life jacket, a boat and a helicopter but you refused each time. What could I have done further?'
Is it possible that the information I am providing you is that which you have been praying for all this time? What if what I am telling you is right? You can't afford to dismiss what might very well be the truth.