Having a girl first

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  • #613818
    blackhatwannabe
    Participant

    I heard that Bas Techilah is a simin yafeh l’banim. Where is the mekor for this?

    #1033955
    golfer
    Participant

    Come on wise and learned men of the CR!

    (Ladies from the shidduch thread that are finding fulfillment studying Talmud are welcome too.)

    Please be kind and tell us exactly where in the Gemara (discussing yerusha and male heirs) we can find this quote.

    #1033956
    squeak
    Participant

    Don’t worry where it comes from. Its just to make people feel better about drawing the short straw.

    #1033957

    Squeak-When we had a girl first our Rav said that it is a siman yafeh l’banim. My first response was, ” is that a brocha?”

    #1033958
    golfer
    Participant

    Squeak!!!

    I know you were kidding.

    But I couldn’t let that pass.

    First of all, no, Chazal did not make statements “just to make people feel better”. It was said with a reason. And when (if?) that learned CR scholar comes forward with the source, we can elaborate.

    And finally, SHORT STRAW ?!?!?!?

    #1033959
    ben9
    Participant

    Bava Basra 141a:Ph ???? ?? ????? ?? ???? ???? ??? ????? ???? ?????? ?????? ????? ????? ????? ??? ????? ??? ???? ????

    #1033960
    squeak
    Participant

    ROTFLMKO

    #1033961
    Lightuptheworld
    Participant

    It’s a gemara in Bava Basra 141a ???? ?? ????: ?? ???? ???? ??? ?????

    The gemara continues ???? ?????: ?????? ?????, ????? ?????: ??? ???? ??? ???? ????

    Some say its because she’ll raise her brothers and some say in order to take away ??? ??.

    It sounds like it’s a reason for why it’s good(???) to have a daughter first more than a Segula

    #1033962
    Patur Aval Assur
    Participant

    To all those asking for the source, it is a Gemara in Bava Basra (141a):

    ???? ?? ???? ?? ???? ???? ??? ????? ???? ????? ?????? ????? ????? ????? ??? ???? ??? ???? ???? ??? ?? ???? ?????? ???? ????? ?? ????

    Interestingly, on the last part Rashi says ??? ?????? ?? ??? ???? ?? ?? ????

    #1033963
    golfer
    Participant

    Thank you wise men who took the time to answer.

    Very interesting Rashi, Patur A A! Thanks for mentioning. Wondering if I should make the connection to Rashi having daughters… or if maybe I should just mind my own business.

    And yes, lightupt, it was never presented to me in the past as a Segulah at all. Just a good thing. And I must say, it actually is!

    #1033964
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    :????? ?”?

    ???? ????? ???????

    #1033965
    Patur Aval Assur
    Participant

    Lightuptheworld:

    I didn’t see your post when I wrote mine – in fact looking at the time stamp, mine was actually first. The Maharsha explains that the reason why it’s good to have a daughter first is that then there will be no bechor and therefore no one will get a larger share of the inheritance. When there is a bechor, the other sons will be jealous and they might cause an ayin hara.

    R’ Menashe Klein says a similar pshat (Shu”t Mishneh Halachos 10:13) – that not having a bechor is good because everyone is equal as opposed to if there is a bechor, there is a chiyuv of kibud for him. (It’s interesting that he doesn’t quote the Maharsha since he is giving the same structural explanation with just a different reason for why it’s good.)

    #1033966
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    lol great usage.

    Everyone, yevamos starts next monday. J’challenge.

    #1033967

    Having a miscarriage or delivering a boy by C-section would also ensure that the family doesn’t have a bechor. I don’t think anyone would argue that a miscarriage is a brocha.

    #1341218
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    Those are bad things on their own, jf02. I don’t think having a girl is necessarily bad.

    #1341257
    Chortkov
    Participant

    ???????????? ??? ???? ?? ?? ???? ????. ???? ?? ??? ??????

    ????

    #1341839
    iacisrmma
    Participant

    JF02: Where is it stated that a bechor born by C-section is not a bechor for “PI SHNAYIM”?

    #1341841
    iacisrmma
    Participant

    I didn’t look at the dates carefully. I apologize to the forum for asking a question on a comment from 3 years ago.

    #1341849
    dafbiyun
    Participant

    When my daughter had a second girl a Rosh Yeshiva made the following comment to me, in jest. We pasken that ‘simanim lav d’oraisa” unless it is a siman muvak. However we also pasken that two ordinary simanim are the equivalent of a siman muvak. So, he said, now your daughter really satisfied bas t’chila siman yafa l’,banim. Naturally her next two children were boys.

    #1341850
    yitzchokm
    Participant

    Jewish feminist, is confusing pidyen hben with becohr

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