height in shiduchim

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  • #612906

    im realy short.im 5 ft 3 and a half.im realy worried about shiduchim.im only 18 but it worrys me.also can i marry s/o taller than me i want to for two reasons1.i dont want my kids to be so short 2.my options wil be wider ie i do.but im realy scared what people will thin

    #1018234

    Well, are you a guy or a gal… it kinda makes a difference when discussing height in shidduchim.

    As far as considering height, a tall guy can marry anyone – a tall girl or a short girl. A short girl can marry anyone – a tall guy or a short guy.

    #1018235

    im a man and mistake im 5 ft 3

    #1018236
    ben_David
    Participant

    ^^

    Obviously she’s a girl. Only girls are worried about shiduchim at 18. Guys (as long as they’re normal) are never worried about shiduchim,….they have a much broader choice and can get married at a later age. 5ft3 for a woman is OK! dont worry. My mother is as short as you and my father is of average height (5.10),…but we (the sons) are all over 6ft,…including one who’s quite big: 6ft4.

    #1018237
    YW Moderator-42
    Moderator

    R’ Moshe Feinstein ZTL was short. Moshe Rabeinu on the other hand, was 18 Amos tall.

    #1018238
    golfer
    Participant

    Ben_Dav, this just goes to show you (and everybody else) – it’s obviously NOT just girls who worry about shidduchim.

    All the hype and crises aside, shidduchim can be tough and complicated for guys as well as girls.

    What I’ve noticed, keep climbing, is that there’s no formula that will predict who will have a hard time and who will breeze through the whole parsha effortlessly.

    I’m sure you know Who’s pulling the strings.

    Today is actually a great day to put in a good word for your future home, for yourself and whoever builds it with you. And it’s never too early to start. Translating the worry into Tefillah might be a good way to set yourself up on the path to success.

    #1018239

    doer anyone know couples where husaand is very short and/or wife is taler

    #1018240

    doer anyone know couples where husaand is very short and/or wife is taler no names just heigt

    #1018241
    jbaldy22
    Member

    keep climbing

    yes there are plenty of them

    there are also plenty of couples who are very close in height

    #1018242

    I know a couple with a seven inch height advantage to the wife

    #1018243

    plenty of what

    #1018244
    oomis
    Participant

    My dad O”H was shorter than my mom O”H. Never bothered my mom a bit, as my dad was “tall” in Torah and intellectually, in middos, artistically, and in his professional expertise.

    AS to your statemtn about not wanting to have short children – you reminded me of the most frustrating phone call I ever received from someone calling me as a “reference” for a shidduch. Her sonw as redt to the daughter of my former landlords, the nicest people, with a beautiful, smart, and special daughter (Well really ALL their kids are wonderful). After asking me a gazillion impertinent questions, wanting to know “where the feet grow,” and me patiently answering them as best I could, while emphasizing what a lovely girl she was and lovely family she had, and after spenind a half hour on the phone, the mothersays, Well I heard the girl is very short, and I don’t want short grandchildren!”

    I will tell you what I told her. How short or tall a child will be is up to the Aibishter. I am the only short member of my family, with two brothers both 6 footers (and who in turn have VERY tall children, and one petite child), and a sister who is about 4″ taller than I am. My husband and I are BOTH short, and we have a 6 ‘ tall son, and another son who is around 5’10. Our daughters are a little shorter, but still taller than I am.

    Two short parents can produce tall children. Two tall parents can produce short children. It is a roll of the gene dice, and Hashem’s Ratzon, and what will be, will be.

    Ideally, you should learn to be happy with yourself as you are. But that is not always realistic and/or possible for some people. If your height really bothers you a great deal to the point where it really affects your self-image badly, I would suggest getting shoes with a little height built-in to the heel and sole (not too much, you don’t want to be deceptive), just in order to enhance what you have. Even an inch difference can make you feel a little better in that type of circumstance.

    #1018245

    plenty of what i dont think you relize im 5 3 and a bachur

    #1018246

    thanks omiss.realy apreciate it

    #1018247
    bhe (Joseph)
    Participant

    Is a child’s height affected more by genes or nutrition and does the parents height have any bearing on their children?

    #1018248
    ihear
    Member

    How do u know ur done growing? I myself was very short and I went to a doctor bec of my height he took some tests and x-ray of my palm (yea palm wtvr long story) anyway turned out I was two years behind in my growth rate so if I was 18 then I was only 16 regarding my hieght and thatt would catch up anyway u should find out if ur done growing.

    Hint: It has a lot to do with puberty

    #1018249
    artachshasta
    Participant

    ??? ?”?: ???? ?? ??? ?????? ??? ??? ??? ????, ??? ?? ??? ???? ??? ??? ??? ????? (Bechoros 45b).

    Well, according to the Gemara, it seems you should specifically not marry someone short…

    #1018250

    i was an early bloomer.my docter said im done growing my reguler growing.i havent grown the whole year.he said i might grow a half a inch or inc

    #1018251
    jbaldy22
    Member

    keep climbing

    i know of 5 couples off the top of my head in which the wife is significantly taller than her husband

    #1018252

    Long live napoleon! (i.e. make a lot a money or compensate in some other way). Do you have good yichus? Yichus and money can solve many shidduch problems and compensate for “biological” ones.

    #1018253
    ben_David
    Participant

    @”does anyone know couples where husaand is very short and/or wife is taller. No names just height”

    Yes I’ve known many, but sorry to be honest,…the husband was usually “special”. Either wealthy, extremely charismatic, very learned, or something that set him apart from the average joe. Try to overcome your physical disadvantage by excelling in something that would make you “special” and raise your shidduch market value.

    #1018254
    MachaaMaker
    Member

    Moderator- and paroh was one ama tall

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