Q: How long should I date a girl before proposing?
A: If you made your investigations beforehand and you know that she’s a healthy girl, and now you’ve dated her a few times and you think that everything is in order, then there’s no reason to wait too long. You can’t wait too long because somebody else might take her away from you. That happens. Yes, I’ve see that happen.
Or, even worse, she might discover who you really are! And therefore, while the illusion is still going on, make sure to utilize the opportunity.
Rav Miller, Tape # 817
“Or, even worse, she might discover who you really are! ”
Was this directed to you?
It was general advice to the klal.
Not up to scratch, Joseph.
The normal you would be positing about how it’s assur to propose, and how the whole concept of proposing comes from the Goyim.
It’s assur to propse.
The whole concept of proposing comes from the goyim.
It depends. Sometimes after 5 dates; sometimes 10 or more. There is no correct answer. If the parents have met and everything is “b’seder” with them, it should be on the next date.
Sometimes after 2 dates.
Its also assur to own a phone or to own a car or a to smoke, to wear a tie etc. They were all introduced by goyim
It wasn’t introduced by the Goyim.
Jewish women proposing to their husbands has been part of the Jewish marriage ever since Rus proposed to Boaz.
Yeah, I was being facetious #PoesLaw
Yekke was being facetious in his comment to you, as well.
No I wasn’t.
Joseph – I think NeutiquamErro was responding to Takes22tango, not to me.
If she finds out who you really are after the wedding, and it is not the person she married, she will probably get the marriage annulled.
I was enlightening anybody it may have concerned as to the nature of my facetiousness. If that helps.
Don’t they say that no one is the same person that his or her spouse thought he or she was after getting married?
LB: Who is they? Everyone. People. Jewish. Your rabbi. Your rebbetzin. NonJewish. Your teacher. Your physician assistant. Your neighbor.
Wait no. Many people say that whole thing about the person you married being different after marriage. That’s life.
But then again, I’ve heard that if you do the work of getting to know the person, in a variety of situations, then you can at least know the foundation of a person.
In other words, you can trust B”H that this person is compatible with you. Or maybe I’m just misinterpretating it with optimism?
The best research needs to be done before you meet the potential shidduch.