This thread is so typical of what is wrong in the yeshiva world today – making a big tzimus because someone decided that since they want to be very frum, the whole world must stop what they’re doing and cater to them, while neglecting simple choshen mishpat that is fundamental to the Torah.

You said, and I quote:

“It’s easy to find fault with the actions of others, much harder to provide a better way.”

I’m not trying to “find fault” with others.

I am saying, however, that the replies to this article have grown from those of concern and possibly discussions of how to correct or deal with the issue, to insults and slander (the article is about tznius and propriety, not about attitudes, prices, ganavim /thieves/ and the like) and bringing in those comments are most definitely spreading lashon horah.

If we feel so strongly about the issues that we feel the need to spread the word to help protect our people, and keep from being tainted by impurities and obstacles, etc., then we should be just as concerned and vigilant about the souls being affected by slander and the spreading of nasty comments; those comments do absolutely nothing to help solve the problem and only aggravate things futher.

As for how those who feel that this is wrong should deal with this or respond? I would suggest approaching your community rabbi or leader, perhaps having a lecture, workshops or speeches to inform the community as to the dangers, along with the whys and wherefores, etc. (That’s not to say that it is the rabbir or leaders job alone to instruct, but it may be helpful if a person in a position of authority and respect would try to reach out to the people to explain in ways the average person may not be able.

Furthermore, if we have these problems to begin with, one would think that the laws haven’t been impressed properly upon the community at large and as such, should be stressed in the home and schools and kehillas across the globe. You can’t slap a bandange on a disease; it needs to be treated at the core.

I understand that passing on the message is important and alerting the public to the infraction may be wise, but it should be done in a respectful manner, and when possible, and educative one.

One would like to think that we are all mature mentchen. If we care so much about these issues and are so intent on rectifying them or spreading the word so others don’t end up suffering from it (i.e. viewing inappropriate materials, etc.), then surely we also care about preserving our fellow man from spreading lashon horah, too?

Wishing you and all Klal Yisroel all the best,
Shaynuk77

1) If the Rosh Yeshiva said something, then I’ll follow it because of Emunas Chachamim.

In regard to tznius vs. pritzus:

2) 50 years ago, and even up until 20 years ago, the majority of Orthodox Jewish women did not cover their hair AT ALL, even the wives of Rabbonim, some of them very prominent ones.
For a woman to cover her hair is a very big Nisayon (obstacle or test) and the fact that we have such nice wigs nowadays allows more and more women to keep this important Mitzvah.
The prohibition in the Torah is not that a woman should not appear beautiful – it is that she must cover her hair and head. There are many reasons but the point is that her OWN hair does not show.
The fact is that a shaitel, while not as holy perhaps as a tichel and hat, for an every day Frum woman it is a perfectly great way to keep this Mitzvah.
If a woman wants to really grow and add on a Chumrah, which is a personal choice that cannot be dictated by anyone else, then it is up to her to choose to wear only tichels and hats which cover the hair fully.
To call a beautiful wig pritzus is undermining a woman’s confidence in keeping this wonderful Mitzvah.

So what should those who feel that this is wrong do? How should they respond?

It’s easy to find fault with the actions of others, much harder to provide a better way.

It is not for uncultured, unrefined laypeople to pass judgment/give advice to the Rosh Yeshiva regarding whom he should appoint to handle such matters.