Comments on: Out Of The Mailbag – To YW Editor (Cautionary Fire-Tale)

By: mom18

mom18 — Fri, 16 May 2008 14:27:40 +0000

Kudos to the writer who brought an important issue to the fore.

As parents, EVERYONE has made (and hopefully learned ) from their mistakes.

But the BIGGEST mistake of all is to rationalize our actions and justify them.

Imagine if you were on trial for child negligence, and the issues of:

a) using a monitor to ‘watch’ your child remotely
b) leaving your infant/ toddler in the tub so you could answer the door/ phone
c) leaving your child in the car while you ‘just run in for something’
d) leaving a child+stroller outside a store.

The only real justification for doing any of the above is if there existed a danger so great, that the risk of doing the above was the safer of the two.

Accidents happen real quick. Just ask any Hatzolah member to give a summary of accidents that happen with children in a given week. As parents we have the awesome responsibility of ensuring that our precious commodities are safe to the best of our ability.

By: Health

Health — Wed, 14 May 2008 05:40:40 +0000

To who me,
I hope you don’t learn in kollel with your krum kop! Do you really think going to sleep in the same house is the same as listening in- to a monitor? People like you- don’t deserve an answer, and it is not nogeiah you because of “Shomer Pessauyim Hashem”, but in case someone believes you, I will make one comment. In my house I have working smoke detectors, if ch’vs there is a fire, the alarm is loud enough to wake everyone up. If the alarms go off in someone else’s house, even if you have a very top of the line monitor, the alarm will not be loud enough for you to respond immediately. It will take you awhile to discern it from the background noise. You only have two minutes to escape a major fire in a home safely. This is almost impossible in your own home without fire safety training, but even with training it would be next to impossible to reach your neighbor’s home in the time allotted, especially if your warning came only through a monitor!

By: yoshi

yoshi — Wed, 14 May 2008 05:21:38 +0000

On the topic of the baby monitors; Besides for being extremely dangerous, and irresponsible on the parents part, it is against the law. You can lose custody of your child in an instant if you leave them unattended -”who_me”- There isn’t a law against parents sleeping in the next room, So yes it is a very big difference between that and giving a monitor to a neighbor. I will not hesitate to call the Cops if I learned there is a baby home alone.

By: who_me

who_me — Tue, 13 May 2008 04:23:33 +0000

Rav Health;

Yelamdeinu Rabeinu,

Why is leaving a sleeping kid with a close-by person monitoring, more a SAKANAH than it is to leave them at night when YOU sleep without ANY-BODY monitoring?

I can only assume that you take shifts with your ‘eishes chayil’ to stay up at night & look after the kids just in case something happens, otherwise “you put your kid in sakanah even for a second, let alone a half-hour”, am I right?

I think that is being over-anxious and as long long that there is no imminent danger, you’re not putting your kid in sakanah. (see comment #14)

By: Health

Health — Mon, 12 May 2008 18:53:27 +0000

Correction:- Last line: to get out alive in case…
Also, the reason why they sell monitors is to listen to your kids if you are in another room!

By: Health

Health — Mon, 12 May 2008 18:39:22 +0000

To #17,
Please remove the title reb from your name. It’s ossur to put your kid in sakanah even for a second, let alone a half-hour. You remind me of the people who still don’t buckle up, saying when I was a kid noone did. Just because people didn’t know better at the time- is no excuse for now! I also wonder how many people know fire safety to get alive in case of a Fire?!

By: vustitzuch

vustitzuch — Mon, 12 May 2008 16:19:30 +0000

Thank you for the awareness Mrs Greenspan! Hatzlacha and best wishes to you and your family.

By: s.s.

s.s. — Mon, 12 May 2008 15:17:06 +0000

Besides for putting your children in danger, I think this is TERRIBLY irresponsible for another reason:
What if something happens that does not necessarily compromise the safety of your children, (because your very responsible neighbor is listening and will take care of any problems) but that may cause the police to be called in? (e.g. there is an intruder, a child choking in bed, a fire… but your neighbor is listening and steps right in to save the day…)
Try explaining to the police that you are MOST DEFINITELY NOT neglectful parents – you left your children with a perfectly responsible babysitter – the moniter with the woman down the block. I am frightened for the parents to whom this could happen – for a little convenience you will risk your children’s safety, and even risk losing your children.
I really do not think this is so far-fetched, and yes, I do live in Lakewood, I know how hard it is to find a babysitter, even when I can get one, I am not able to afford it any better than you can, and guess what? I STAY HOME MOST EVENINGS!!!! If I must go out, I will either get that babysitter, or my husband will just have to make arrangements to be home.
My children are too precious to me to take even a minute risk and leave them home alone. (yes, ALONE.)

By: AvodasChesedOutofTwn

AvodasChesedOutofTwn — Mon, 12 May 2008 14:04:22 +0000

Apartment insurance is a very sensible and important precaution in looking out for your family, but please remember many of us are on VERY tight budgets, and while we may know we SHOULD do it, it keeps getting moved to “next month” or so because we simply can’t pay for it this month. Even $100 can be difficult, but ours is $150 and only pretty basic, so depending on your neighborhood, it is probably somewhat more. We do have it, but paying another bill can be hard. So please don’t insult people who don’t have it.

But I think this is an opportunity to suggest this would make an excellent wedding present, (especially with a Kollel or otherwise financially strained couple) perhaps shared among a few friends of the new couple. Maybe given as a gift certificate? With a couple disposable cameras with prepaid development to take pictures of belongings.

Are there a few frum insurance folks out there who could arrange for such a gift certificate option?

The couple would then be covered for the first year (or more) and maybe it would help make it a habit to continue to have the renter’s insurance.

But b’lee ayin ha’ra no one should need it. Fire is dangerous and devastating.

Kol Tov

By: rbsyid

rbsyid — Mon, 12 May 2008 06:51:45 +0000

Dear Family Greenspan,
Hashem Yemaleh Chesronchem.
One comment: I think that there are times when monitors are useful tools e.g. when a wife has to go out and her husband is returning in 15 minutes.
I would say that up to a half hour one can rely on such a gadget but not for a full evening!
Besuros Tovos!