The problem is we think we control reality. Great. We made resumes put everyone in neat little trying to control control control control. When you “shop” for a partner do you care if he’s compatible with you or only that he checks all your arragent stuck up control boxes. Chill. Who’s in control G-d and He knows how to make everything work much better then we do. Now what is your tafkid. To not be so crazy and just. Go. Out. Your hishtadlus isn’t to carry the burden of making it work but honing your belief system to stop judging and controlling life so harshly. You don’t need a resume to get married. Actually you just have to actually start. Dating. You don’t need to scrutinize every last detail you need to trust the process and your own discernment the same way you can “discern” what resume “references” are saying you can use that same nasty skillset to judge the person your talking to read between the lines and see he’s for you. Oh actually you need to date to see if your compatible not see if he’s “perfect”
