Your issues may be legitimate. I haven’t really read it through. I’m not sure what you’re answering, though. Are you saying that they’re only here to help you form your own ability to think, and now you’ve no need to follow ?! Certainly that process should happen, and you should have the ability to make decisions on your own. But if they explicitly instruct you one way, you don’t listen ?
If what you mean is that you’re not questioning l’mayseh, but are just trying to understand, then I withdraw my question.