GAW, I have had a change of heart. I have thought this through thoroughly, thoroughly, I say…now since there were 30+ years since I was bas mitzvahed I have a LOT, and I mean a LOT of drinking to catch up on, and I refuse to wait for Purim. I’m going to be machmir and shtart, stat, eh, COMMENCE, yes COMMENCE a half hour ago. I WILL get drunk this Purim. I just hope I remember to leave detailed instructions for someone to defrost, heat up, and put the finishing touches on the seudah…not that I expect to have an appetite. And if I don’t have an appetite then no one will! Great, no seudah this year. Thank you, thank you so much. So glad I have now heard the truth about this wonderful opportunity, after years of it being hidden from me and my commadres by the patriarchy (matriarchy? who IS behind this conspiracy to keep us women from drinking?). When did our holy ancestresses drink in history and why have we been denied for so many generations? I want answers! And I want answers now!
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