The ten guys I speak to are at my shul. Honestly, I haven’t really gone out of my way to speak to guys since I was in hs before the bais yaakov stage. Also, you really do not have the right to judge as perhaps I am really making this opinion based on multiple conversations with guys who are baalei teshuva (which I am) including guys. I do not really live in that culture anymore and do not want to raise my children in that type of culture. Also, I need someone with solid minhagim.
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