The very purpose of existence is to reconcile the glowing opinion we hold of ourselves with the appalling things that other people think about us.
— Quentin Crisp
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe.
— Albert Einstein
When children are doing nothing, they are doing mischief.
— Henry Fielding
Why do people say “no offense” when they’re about to offend someone?
— Author Unknown