When my first child was born, my husband wanted to set up a “college fund” that we would contribute to, on a small basis, every month.
I said – you can always borrow money for college, go to a community college for two years, have the kids work etc. BUT, how can you afford a wedding, after paying yeshiva tuition for 20 something years?
That is what we did, opened an account, put a small amount in each month, a percentage of any unexpected income, etc.
When all our children got married, we were BH” able to afford nice, middle-class weddings, Sheitlech, etc.
College & Grad School were a mishmash of scholarships, loans, partial tuition, grants, etc.
THAT we finally paid off, 7 years after our youngest finished her education.
This I learned from MY parents.