many people send out invitations to the chupa and dancing but not for the meal. It has already been implemented, and even with driving, a simcha is a simcha. If you don’t want to go, the hosts will surely understand but if you do, there will be cake and fruit and a warm welcome waiting. Many people who ARE invited to the dinner opt out because it is hard to commit to a whole evening and the babysitting costs are high.
i feel bad about not being able to have everyone there, and i have included some of those i left out in the sheva brachos lists.