Simcha613, to answer your question about feeling hakaras hatov without being able to express it, the answer is yes, the concept exists. A famous story comes to mind:
(From a Cross-Currents article, written by Yonoson Rosenblum)
As a bochur learning in Mir, Rabbi Schwab decided one year just prior to Yom Tov to return home for the holiday. He borrowed money from Reb Yerucham for the trip. Upon his return to Mir, he repaid Reb Yerucham and thanked him. Reb Yerucham sharply criticized him for the expression of gratitude on the grounds that it raised serious halachic issues of ribis (interest).