Paying for a wedding is not tax deductible. Simply using a yeshiva as a go between doesn’t kasher It. A local family was incurring huge Legal bills in a child custody issue, and asked people who wanted to help defray the cost to make the checks payable to a fund the shul set up for the purpose. The shul was informed that simply making the payments thru the shul did not make them deductible and closed the fund.
The Darchei fund is on the up and up. All I’m saying is that the donation might not be deductible. People deduct the full cost of Darcheis dinner, it doesn’t mean Darchei did anything wrong