I AM saying that the marriage is EQUAL, but everyone has different roles in the marriage. One of them is the leadership role and that is the husband’s.
Now you don’t have to agree with me on my perception of what marriage is and that Rabbi Miller’s analogy applies only in the area of leadership within the marriage and I don’t percieve his analogy of captain and first mate describing the marriage less than 50/50 od the sum total of the marriage, rather that it describes who gets the role of the leader in marriage.
Marriage is not only about the leadership role, but rather the purpose of marriage is to build a binyan adey ad. And to complete this goal the husband and wife need to fulfill their respective roles and those include other roles in addition to leadership.
Again you don’t have to agree with my perception of marriage and how I view what Rabbi Miller meant.
Partners can be equal and yet each marriage partner must fulfill defferent roles so that the marriage can flow smoothly – as smoothly as it could when it’s made up of two different pesonalities and genders.