Reply To: Going off the Derech

Wandering Teen- when you said, ‘part of it is feeling no connection for whatever reason”, do you mean to the mitsvos, the lifestyle or Judaism in general? Also, may I ask how old you were when you came to respect your parents? You show a lot of maturity and insight in your words.

daniela-I agree with you that I feel we must take responsibility and make the decisions. But how do we force compliance? Like I said, I don’t think I could threaten to throw my son out of the house if he doesn’t conform. Yet we don’t seem to have any other leverage.

When we wanted to speak with my son’s Rebbe, it was a while back when my son wasn’t looking to leave Yeshiva. And yes, if my son was dead set against us speaking to his Rebbe, then I wouldn’t. Although I would try to convince him to change his mind. I might have spoken to the Rebbe anyway, however, if I was positive that it wouldn’t get back to my son. But in this case, I wasn’t guaranteed that confidentiality.

In line with what Josh31 said, I don’t think Shammai would have sent away a troubled Jew.