I agree with you about the activities. And I have davka been advised that I should do things on dates (not that it’s up to me…)
OF COURSE it is up to you. If you aren’t assertive when you are dating, how can you expect your future husband to know you as anything other than a pushover?
The result of pushing them will be a light attitude towards real halachot.
This has already happened in the realm of “Tznius”.