I can be totally wrong, but it seems like the best thing for you is to focus on yourself and creating boundaries to have healthier relationships with friends and family. It is hard because you are not in control.
At the same time, you have a choice. Guys will get over it. If they need a ride, and you are right there with your car, crazy as it may seem, Hashem may have set it up for you to witness or hear about so that you choose to not give him a ride. You will drive home with an extra seat and that could be an example of you passing your nisayon.
Right now your husband is alive. He is living his life and probably looking for you too.