I think being picky comes from having too many choices, sometimes. For example, say a guy has a list of 30 girls. Say 20 sound more or less like what he is looking for. How to decide who to go out with? Probably not alphabetic order or order in which they were suggested. More likely pickiness will determine which ones get a no- this one’s name is unappealing, this one is too tall, this one has too many siblings, this one’s mother is not in the right profession, etc. If each potential shidduch could be evaluated on its own, without comparison to others, as if this was the only offer, maybe people would not be so picky?
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