Shopping
“Such as hearing a rule from a school then hearing their own parents bash it by saying it’s wrong, unbased on halacha, bad, extreme, etc”
I couldnt agree more.
The issue though is, what should parents do if a school says not having hair 4 inches past shoulders is halacha (im not saying this school said that) and the child asks her parent if this is true. should they lie?
I dont think chinuch is 100% the purview of the school, parents have a role too. And parents are at an advantage in some ways as it is easier to personalize the chinuch and deliver nuance. IT is easier for the school to say “The policy is no hair longer than 4 inches past the shoulders as is required al p ihalacha by all bnos Yisroel” Than to deliver nuance. Parents are better equipped to deliver nuance to their child. Though it has to be done carefully.