JJ2020 – “Realitycheck- I’m hearing that being to overly machmir about tznius leads to people not even keeping more meikel opinions. Does this only apply to tznius? Or also Shabbos, kashrus and any other area? Or is there something specific about tznius?”/ It could be this would be true about Shabbos , kashrus and other areas. However in those areas we don’t have this oppressive, aggressive overly exaggerated approach. I heard a Rav once complaining as to how there could exist a dichotomy where the husband looks like this wonderful frum yeshivash “avreich” and the wife is dressed inappropriately.
“Could you elaborate on the extreme oppressive badgering? For example if girls wear skirts above the knee should this be let pass? Should the schools find new rabbinical boards to make less strict rules?” I don’t think it’s that the rules need to change (though if a school has a rule that the skirt must be 15 cm lower than the knee, and they are measuring it with a ruler they might want to change that rule) as much as attitudes toward tznius education needs to change. Educating about tznius should be done with more tznius! If there is a serious issue with the way a particular girl is dressing it certainly should be addressed, but there is no need to make it seem like external tznius (and chumras at that) is the only yardstick with which to measure if a girl (starting at 3 years old in some schools) is a good Jew. Many schools hold to a high standard of Kashrus but you don’t hear them singling out kashrus and railing about it at every opportunity. Ditto with every other aspect of Judaism.