@Golfer
two years ago I attended a symposium on the success of marriage counseling given by the local chapter of the American Psychological Association.
The subject of the success of marriage counseling was discussed in detail. The results presented by the panel of practicing CT marriage counselors mirrored my observation of couples going through the civil divorce process.
Few marriages are saved by marriage counseling. Once the marriage is so far broken/damaged that both members of the couple are willing, or court ordered to undergo marriage counseling, the marriage is not saved. The counselor often shows the couple why the marriage should be dissolved, often reinforcing the feelings of the party seeking the divorce.
this is quite DIFFERENT from one partner seeking a therapists help in trying to improve the marriage. Individual, or even couples therapy may strengthen a weak marriage, but that is not the same as marriage counseling which does not deal with an individual’s underlying psychological state