rational, I agree. But at this point I’m not wearing a Shabbos dress to my kids’ weddings, I’m just trying to keep expenses “relatively” low… Don’t forget, a musician and singer costs money too- you can have mp3 players and do without them as well. Only close family like siblings, aunts, uncles, grandparents, and first counsins should be invited to the meal, why invite neighbors, freinds, co-workers etc. ? There are expenses that cost way more than $800 for a dress. A bare-minimum, no extras wedding night costs about $10,000 excluding gowns, hairstyling, makeup, -I think the entire idea of spending this much for one night is a himmel geshrei.
The rosh yeshiva of Breslov yeshiva in Williamsburg is marrying off his own kids for $7,000, all wedding expenses included, including silver jewelry (not gold), cheap furniture, etc, mamesh everything is included for $7,000. Many of his talmidim have also done the $7000 wedding. The wedding night is celebrated in the yeshiva building, the meal is cooked by the yeshiva’s cook and served by the talmidim. They have an mp3 playing- no band. The women don’t rent dresses only wear their Shabbos clothing as the men do …
I personally wouldn’t give fake jewelry to a kallah and I do believe in buying strong furniture for young couples ( which costs $16,000-18,000). I just don’t think it’s right to spend over $10,000 for one night. That’s money flushed down the toilet in my opinion. I believe a wedding should cost nor more than $5,000 for both sides together with everything included and no extras like dress rentals.