common – I totally hear what you are saying about want vs need. I do agree as well that in the want category there are some things that are gashmiyusdik wants that are to serve us, and some ruchniyus wants that are good for us, such as having family over and owning new clothes for yuntif (that are affordable etc). I don’t think you are refuting this, I’m just throwing it out there.
When people talk about managing tho, I don’t think managing is the question. When our power went out for two days (1999) in single digit weather, my family (including a newborn) ‘managed’. We sat under blankets and read books etc. But the question isn’t about managing, the question is – did it bring you closer to Hashem? Did it give you an opportunity to grow in ruchniyus? Did it give you time/perspective/pause/opportunity to learn that Hashem runs the world and we need to let go and stop trying to fix things and control the world around us. We managed before washing machines, we managed before fax machines, but we didn’t manage before antibiotics. Managing is surviving. I don’t think Hashem wants to see if we can “manage” without our “stuff”. I think (heard this from many recent shiurim) that the question here is what do we need to bring us closer to Hashem? What do we need to take ourselves up a notch in our observance? What do we need to strengthen our emunah and bitachon? And what do we just need because it enhances our existence personally (like ice coffee or sudokus) or allows us to enhance someone elses (yummy treats for the kids, flowers)?
Instead of pondering wants vs needs, I think it should be pondering things we want that are good for us (will bring us closer to Hashem) vs things we want that are not good for us (relationships with people who don’t watch their words) and also things we need to bring us closer to our tafkid/tikun/Borei Olam.