I’ll stick with Shulchan Aruch and the Shulchan Aruch HaRav, that you shouldn’t drink so much wine that you, Chas V’Shalom, might do an aveira, including forgetting to bentch or say Maariv. And that someone who might have trouble with drinking doesn’t have to drink at all.
I’ve told my teenage sons that they are free to drink wine at home on Purim, where I can keep an eye on them, but not to have any alcohol away from home.
Personally, I usually have a bottle or two of wine and then take a nap. B”H I’ve never been drunk enough to have a hangover or to forget bentching.