Joseph: “but what Zalman said certainly has a factual basis in poiskim”
What Poskim? If you want an exercise in Lamdus, then do the daf.
Or if you want to know what Rabbonim and Poskim do l’maise (in actuality), then you have to see how they “fir zich”, how they determine and advise geyrim with regard to relationships with their families. What’s so difficult, it’s not brain surgery. In fact, when you have a Rav (and everone should), it’s quite easy. This is what Zalman and company does not want to accept.