i THINK this is simple
there is no Mitzvah here of Kibud Av v Em
what there is though is an obligation of Hakores Hatov
there may be other psychological issues as well
that has to balanced against issues of havdallah
so clearly every case needs specific guidance as to the Halachah and proper behavior, not only each case, but many situations in any individual case will need separate decisions by a competent Rav.