Outoftowner
You are a living example of why daas torah is so important. You are wrong from your opening sentence to your closing argument…..and you also happened by chance to completely miss the point. Seeing as it is right after yom kippur, I may grant that you will never want to face the truth, but I feel the need to point out your absurdity to anyone willing to face logic even if they don’t like it.
You begin by saying that “We have a big problem these days.” Really? We have a big problem these days? This is a new problem that just came up that you did not know about when your children were young and you gave them all kinds of candy at every opportunity? When you were young ugly people were pretty and let me guess the guys would only marry girls older than them. Right. OK.
And I quote your last point:
“I just don’t think it is right, and many times you should not judge a person at face value, by appearance alone, and if you look a little beyond surface deep you will find something beautiful you weren’t willing to give a chance before.”
You seem to feel that it is definitely true that just because a guy won’t marry her then it must be true that he is only looking “surface deep”. I would say that it is very possible that he knows all about the stuff under the surface and he’s not judging her at face value and if there was only one thing necessary in a marriage(that being “wonderful, beautiful, amazing girls, who have good middos, are tzanua, are pleasant, and sweet, who have good jobs, and looking forward to raising a family”)then he would marry her, BUT there are other things that might hold him back. Maybe she’s 44. Is that looking skin deep? Maybe she’s got no arms. Is that looking skin deep? Maybe she’s not jewish. Is that looking skin deep? Maybe she’s fat. Is that looking skin deep? Maybe she’s 22 but divorced with newborn triplets. Is that looking skin deep? Maybe she smokes like a trucker. Is that looking skin deep? Maybe a combination of the above. That doesn’t mean that she’s not “wonderful, beautiful, amazing girls, who have good middos, are tzanua, are pleasant, and sweet, who have good jobs, and looking forward to raising a family” It just means that the average guy is not going to marry her. ostrasized
Finally, you completely missed the point. We’re talking about a person’s life here. We’re talking about choosing a person to become a part of oneself to form a whole. Is someone expected to even consider thinking about how other people will feel about their decision? Should a person marry someone just to help a crisis? If you will answer yes, I suggest you insist that all fat girls and smoker boys should marry each other.