youre right, thats what i was implying, most non-Jews are respectful.
however, just b/c it is accepted, expected and a polite gesture, it doesnt make it right/mutar.
it is accepted among the non-Jewish world to drive on Saturday. Jews dont look to the derech hagoyim to decide how we conduct ourselves.
BUT you did make a good point; i think that theres a fine line between being “me’ever layarden” like Avraham (him on one side, the world on the other) with regard to mitzvos, and s/t that will cause a chillul Hashem, which i dont think refusing to shake mens hands will cause.