I once heard a speaker put it very nicely. The husband and wife are as if in a play. The husband of course is the main actor. However, the wife is the scenery. The the backdrop in teh play is sunshine than even if the main actor wants to come in shivering and act cold, he can only do in the play as the backdrop allows. So the one that sets up the backdrop is actually setting the stage for the act that the main actor can play.
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