SJS,
I don’t want to sound ornery, but at the same time, wanted to give you some food for thought:
In another thread, you noted that you would like to redo your kitchen with more expensive materials, in order that it should last for 40 years. You also noted that you know you will need to ask for a tuition break.
Now, I’m no judge or morality, and have no moral wisdom whatsoever to tell you if this is or isn’t appropriate. However, of course you know that those who pay full tuition, plus are asked to contribute more and more over the year, are filling in for those who need to ask for breaks. I people who are asked by their children’s schools for extra contributions over and over, because the schools are in desperate need. They are happy to help, and consider it tzedaka. However, it is actually tzedaka that is needed because the school giving you a break because you can’t afford the full amount of tuition. Are YOU putting yourself in a situation where you would like a “better” kitchen, to need to “accept” a break, which actually takes money out of others’ pockets to close the gap created by breaks?
I am making no judgment at all- simply pointing out that your finger-pointing at what you judge “immoral” may not be appropriate in light of the things YOU do. Perhaps what you are doing is ok, perhaps what they are doing is ok. Perhaps none of you are moral, perhaps only one of you are moral. Who knows. But perhaps it’s better not to point the “moral” finger, when it is so easy to find morally questionable “doings” in the finger-pointer.
Please don’t take offense, just meant as food for thought.