I think that part of what is causing the problem is sinas chinam, a lack of achdus, or close- mindedness- whatever you want to call it. For example, why are girls who sfardi only getting thought of about other sfaradim even if they are not suitable. Hello, maybe she wants someone askenazi- maybe ask her. Another prob.- she is not the right kind of sfardi- not to mention that she grew up in an ashkenazi neighborhood and does not mind switching minhagim. and then there are the ridiculoud questions- like do the dishes get stacked at the table or brought in individually. Does the fatehr take the subway or a bus to work? HELLO, who cares? Is that what is really important or is that what is causing the shidduch crisis and the divorce rate to go up? these are only examples that happened to people I know, and I am sure there is a lot more out there.
