estherh: I’ve received a lot of insensitive comments, but yours tops them all. Unfortunately my wife and myself went through the same tzara twice. The second time, after we already knew, we went to the hospital to get finished. When we went to the delivery room, I told the nurse quietly that I wanted to tell her something important, then she tells me to go register first, I repeated 4 or five times that it was very important, but she wouldn’t listen. After I left she tells my wife to go to the monitor, and my wife tells her. She goes over to another nurse, and says loud enough that my wife could hear. They couldn’t tell us earlier.
The worst part was I was in the opposite situation. A young father, and his mother in law approach me, and very exuberantly tell me they’re new parents grand parents, and I responded with a mazel-tov. The new father starts pushing me to tell me what we had, I tried avoiding him, but really had no choice. Doing my best
I said that baruch hashem we have four healthy children, and this one didn’t make it. I patted him on the back and said, this one was a tikun. Their faces changed completely.