My friend went out (with her husband) came back from first date and said NO WAY! She refused to go out again, saying it will NEVER work, he’s just so different in anything they discussed and he got her so nervous… Her mother convinced her that it’s not nice, especially since the boy was very enthusiastic and excited to continue. They went out again and the rest is history…
But on the other hand, I once dated a boy, who after the first date realized is not for me, (he was very enthusuastic) but I kept being convinced into another date, because maybe it could work, I have to give it a chance… Anyway, I went out with this guy FIVE times (did not enjoy a single date) and felt so cruel knowing I have no interest in marrying him. (The last date, he even tried getting a little ‘serious’ with me, and I’m thinking, DONT GO THERE, THIS IS HISTORY FROM THE SECOND YOU DROP ME OFF! (The reason I continued for so long was because each date got a DROP better, but at the end of the day, even if he got a little more manageable, he was not for me – and I could tell that from the first date.
(I want to add that lots of the pressure on me to keep dating him was from a shiur we had at the end of seminary, where we were told that lots of singles are still waiting around through their own fault, they say no to a boy for invalid reasons that dont really matter in a marriage, you have to be sure that you could never live with the guy before you say no… and I was so scared of pushing away my bashert. Everything must be taken with a pinch of salt.)