Let me try again…
I have erred. I should have realized that this could have been a deep sensitive issue for some – something which I look at intellectually, because I have not been in shidduchim for a long time, and B”H did not spend long there. Hashem has tested me in other ways, but not that way. So I lack sensitivity. I look at shidduchim intellectually. I write my opinions for mental relaxation, a break from my demanding work.
Others may be more sensitive, and my intellectual, facts on the ground on the approach – can be deeply hurtful if you are in the midst of shidduchim, and the cruelty that it often brings. My justifications to such a person would feel hurtful. Right or wrong. I too would be caustic about the issue. I too would be sharp & angry. I too would feel insulted.
I should have picked on the clues that this was personal all along.
Unfortunately, shidduchim can be almost dehumanizing for girls in our society. That certainly generates very real resentment – if not at the boys, or at the system – or at an all too clear and relentless poster in an internet forum who forgets to realize that for some this is no intellectual exercise.
This being the case, I certainly apologize. I am sorry sacriledge. I did not approach this issue with due sensitivity. I hope you forgive me. And if you are indeed in shidduchim, I doubly apologize, and certainly hope that you find your zivug soon.
And I hope, friends, while I appreciate you sticking up for me, you will not err as did I.