I think that when you go to a particular shul you understand that the RAV is the Rosh of the shul and you are obligated to give him kovod. If you do not respect that RAV you should not go to that shul. If you choose to go there it is not up to you to decide if what YOU decide to do is kovodik or not, it is whether others will perceive what you are doing is kovodik to the Rav and that will cause machlokis and loshan horah. It goes beyond the scope of just you, yourself and your own opinion. If the RAV chooses to speak then it is expected that the kehilah listens. Your choice is to stay and listen or to leave and go elsewhere.
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