Ben Levi and Gabboim, you are both making statements that are questionable. I personally am acquainted with TOO many yeshivah/kollel couples who either broke up after less than six months of marriage, or became pregnant and are waiting for the baby to be born before taking the final step. That is especially sad, because now another life will be involved.
You are closing your eyes to the truth, if you believe what you posted, because it is much nicer to believe what you said, than to recognize that two people who barely know each other, do not know what they are in for when they get married too quickly, and with a false sense of what marriage will be like (especially for the kollel wife, who is made to believe that her life will be perfect as a true Eishes Chayil). Yes, there are many who do manage to live the life happily, but make no mistake – there are many who do NOT.
I know couples who are NOT divorcing, but the wives are totally disenchanted with the kollel life, primarily because their husbands are never around when they are needed. Many of them had babies within the first year, and if they do not live near either set of parents, they are struggling on their own with babysitters, working full time both to support the family AND pay the babysitter, coming home exhausted to an infant who needs attention, AND having to prepare dinner for their husbands, who waltz in from Yeshivah, MAYBE play with the baby for a few minutes, eat dinner with them, and go back for night seder. This was not the idea many of those girls had in mind when they were talked into the beauty of kollel life. It is a miracle that many of them continue to accept this, and I applaud them for their strength, but make no mistake, there are many young women who are NOT accepting this and feel betrayed by their seminary teachers, their married friends who were not candid with them, and the social pressure that was put on them to begin with, to get married without thinking things through first and having a plan.
You may disagree with me all you like, and maybe ion your circle of friends you do not see this, but statistically, you are mistaken. The divorce rate has risen among ALL frum people, including the yungerleit.
“The masculinization of women being pressed into society by the feminists, and unfortunately affecting even some frum folks, is a leading cause of this.” (Gabboim)
Yep, and it is not the fault of the “feminists,” but rather a society of frum men who do not want to understand that it is THEIR job to provide for their families, not their wives’ responsibility. We have forced women into this role, and not only made it mandatory, but LAUDITORY. When did it become insignificant and shameful almost, for a woman to raise her children?