eclipse, I and everyone else in the CR feels for you. May I offer you a way to look at this day and looking at the bright side? Thank Hashem, that He sent you this Tzara instead of someone near and dear to you having a terrible Machla. You will also have Simchos bKarov!
Everyone has their hardships in life. As much as we dont think our problems can be even more heart-breaking, they definitely can be! All we have to do is look around a bit.
We love you, eclipse! H U G S !