adorable: I missed it (until just now) when you said “I dont think a person can ever feel really “whole” without a spouse- that is the way Hashem made the world- we are always looking for our other half”
It all depends on the stage of life that you are at and your life story. I am divorced in my 60’s and was married for almost 40 years. I can tell you that I am more “whole” now than I was during my entire marriage. The only wonderful benefit of my marriage was my most amazing daughter (and her very fine and loving husband and, of course, my 2 grandsons). Right now, I am happier than I have ever been in my adult life. I don’t even know if I would ever consider marriage again. He would have to be a very, very special person. Occasionally I think that it would be nice to have a companion to attend functions and concerts with, but I have plenty of girlfriends to go to these things with. I know that you are much younger than I and of course, your life’s goals at this stage, are far different. If you want to have a family, then of course,you will want a marriage. But, remember that a person can definitely be whole – at any age – without a spouse. And never, ever, sell yourself short and settle for someone, just because you want a family. You deserve better than that and in fact, you owe it to yourself to find someone who respects you and your goals, just as you will do the same for him.