If the person changed, then they arent who they were in the past. That makes the past irrelevant to the present and future. Just like we dont hold against a person what they did as a child same thing if someone made some mistakes and learned from them and GREW from them then the past has no relevance.
This isn’t about blame or about holding it against them. You should want to be open with your spouse. You should want to share your struggles. You shouldn’t be afraid of rejection.
I dont know why you think a wife or husband has to know everything about their spouse.
I’ll put it this way: If you think your spouse would reject you if she knew things about you, then she doesn’t really love you or respect you, she rejects you. She is married to a phantom creature of her imagination. I don’t want my wife to marry a phantom; I want her to be married to me.
A healthy spouse only cares about who you are inside. They love you for who you are and what you have become.
Agreed. Which is why you should not be afraid to tell her. Because if you are afraid to tell her, it means you think she does not only care about who you are inside.
Besides, I don’t believe that things in your past have no influence on who you are. If you have overcome things and grown from them, they are part of you in that way.