collegegrad, I am really sorry that you feel that way. In all honesty when I say that, I say it from love and not from pity. If I give someone a bracha it is because I care and I feel their pain.
It is a Segula for a couple who don’t have children to be Kvata at a bris. If we have to worry that they would be insulted by the phone call and the kibud then no one would give this kovod and z’chus to childless couples.
I understand your sensitivity in this issue, but how do you know that all these brochas do NOT help one find their zivug? Maybe all these brachas are being a meilitz yosher for the single person and is helping along with their own tefilos to reach Hashem? It is common for everyone to wish each other I”YH by your children as well, not only to singles. So please be aware no one is purposely going over to singles to “single” them out. But I do appreciate what you are saying and how sensitive you are.
Is it possible that you are just not receiving it in the way it is meant? Specifically because you are so sensitive about it? Obviously you don’t have to discuss your situation with any yenta, but a bracha is a bracha. And you never know where your shidduch is going to come from. I apologize in advance if I offended you in any way, it is not my intention. I truly understand what you are saying, but it is almost rude to not offer a bracha and good wishes to another person.