Reply To: Unsent Letters

Okay, I’ll start. I wrote this one to my ex-friend (I’ll call her “Leah”), whom I dropped after realizing how emotionaly and spiritually sick she is. (I wrote it after hearing from one of my friends that she awaites my reply to a cruel letter she had sent me.)

Leah, I was surprised to hear that you’re awaiting my reply to your letter. This goes to show that you’re not “totally okay” with dropping you, as you claimed.

To me, it seems as if you still have the hope deep down tha you’ll revive this “friendship” one day. Well, I’m sorry, but forget it. I am absolutely better off without you, as I’m sure you’ve seen for yourself. I’m happy, confident, VERY close to Hashem and got many “new” friends.

Leah, I must say, I really pity you. (Although it took some time to get over the anger and really pity you.) I don’t think I’ve ever met anybody as unfortunate as you. In fact, I don’t think it’s your fortune, but rather YOU. You rreally aren’t aware of the good world out there. And the sad part is, you don’w want to admit it exists! All you want is drown in a sea of depression and self-pity. You enjoy it! You don’t want to HELP yourself.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I don’t have the koach to get involved in your life right now. I don’t know where you’re up to in Yiddishkeit right now, and I don’t care. Because YOU don’t care about yourself. I know you’re mad at me because I dropped you after you started keeping shabbos – and you did it solely for me.

Well, you really make me laugh. I also recall now that you ate for my sake.

Leah, it’s YOUR life. Do with it as you please! If you’re so stupid to think that you’re keeping shabbos for ME, then…I don’t know. If you want to lead the other type of life – go ahead. Nobody’s stopping you. You know fully well the truth. You know that there’s NOTHING there. And you know that you’ll be punished severely for your every aveirah. I KNOW that you know that. Unfortunately, Mrs. _____(her mentor) is still fooled by you. She thinks she has to “explain” everything to you. But I know that you’re smarter than that. You and I know the truth: You know what’s right. But you still have a choice. I won’t be held accountable for your actions. You will. So don’t you think you’re threatening anyone by saying you’ll do who-knows-what. The only one you’re hurting is YOURSELF.

My point in writing was not to make you aware of your status in life, nor to prove that I’m happy.

All I did, was fulfill your wish: sending you a letter.

With a happy and carefree heart,

Observanteen