Having been OTD once, came back and now struggling a second time, there are lots of reasons why a person would stray from the right path. 1st of all, people don’t go off for no reason. They go off because they are in pain and are struggling with some deep issues. I went off when I was depressed and didn’t know how to express it. I wasn’t clinically depressed but deep down I was crumbling part by part. When I thought I was strong and came back, it was more like a sudden yearning for inspiration and connection and then it dissipated. Now I’m struggling with facts-such as if Hashem exists altogether and how frum I truly want to be. It is not someone who’s never experienced the pain of it’s place to judge those who did.
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