I have never once had any Tefillah, large or small, answered in any satisfactory manner. It’s very disheartening, actually. “
Sam, you may be unaware of your tefilos being answered. Like any loving parent, sometimes our requests are answered with a “no.” I hate to sound trite, because you are obviously saddened and a little disillusioned by this, but the fact is Hashem is not our servant to command, or even our paid employee. He does what HE knows is best for us, and we don’t always recognize that fact right away. Sometimes not even for years. I have davened for certain things in my life, Hashem said no, and in retrospect, it was much better for me this way. But it took me many years to understand the negative ramifications had my bakashos been granted.
I hope you will be able to see the good in your life. You sound very unhappy, and I feel bad that at such a young age things feel so bleak to you. But you know what, many people in their teens and twenties feel that way, and get a different perspective as they get older.