Itzik,
The fact that you are willing to stick it out just a bit more… I am awed.
That’s exactly how we’re advised to fight the yetzer horah- telling ourselves we will fight just one more battle, one more hour, day, week… YOU CAN DO IT.
I really have complete faith in your abilities.
As some members have already pointed out, it had occurred to me that “mishaneh makom, mishaneh mazel” seems to apply well in your case.
From the many stories you’ve shared, it sounds like the place where you live requires a herculean will and effort just to stay frum.
Your situation is inevitable. We are only mortal humans.
I will reiterate that I am awed that you are putting up a fight.
Much Hotzlocha, Itzik. We look forward to hearing from you.
We are davening for you.
-areivim