What shlishi said in the first sentence.
Feif un you have a point but I think holding people to standards you dont hold by is a double standard and using it in this argument after the fact, in my opinion possibly demonstrates a notion of being moreh heter liatzmo (self entitlement), though I totally agree its applicable where its applicable. In other contexts its perfectly fine even if youre not holding there. I hope I’m wrong.
While were on the subject I should mention even deeper levels of ahavas yisroel or acceptance or whatever you want to call it. For example there is a profound pirush on ma dialach sani lichavrach lo saavid which says that adam karov eitzel atzmo and al kol pshoim tichase ahava. If you use the correct cheshbon (specified there) of how reiacha is komocha you can even project this self love and al kol pshoim tichase ahava (ironically not approriate for yourseld in certain aspects) on your fellow and literally be less emotianally by it (but not oblivious). Theb Hashem will reciprocate mida kneged mida as the posuk says lo hibit aven biyaakov. This can be viewed as complimentary or deeper than the other cheshbonos, whatever. See here baarucha:
http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=16082&st=&pgnum=65