Hi Aurora!
I’m not a big “responder” here, but i enjoy reading your posts and am fascinated with your interest in, and return to your roots . In Hebrew we say- “Kol Hatchalot Kashot”- all beginnings are difficult, and i have a lot of admiration for your persistence. I do not mean to be judgmental at all but regarding your mention of S Y Agnon I wanted to say- I don’t think his writing is a good place to start. There is a great deal of literature out there by Jewish authors on Judaism. Not all of it is truthful and trustworthy. The hashkafa (outlook) presented sometimes, unfortunately, deviates from true Torah belief. I suggest putting aside Agnon for a while, until you yourself have become more acquainted with Torah study.